How much do you know about men's behavior?

This educational content is designed to help you get the most out of your intimate relationships. By "relationship" we mean the dating, mating, and sex game -- that fun activity we spend so much energy on!

Historically, what women wanted was to have a strong mate who could protect her and the offspring as well as provide for them until they could fend for themselves. This is the way it had to be for millions of generations in order to survive predators, ice ages, and uncountable hazards living in the often hostile environment. Women who selected strong, protective, and caring men for mates survived best and had the most children survive.

Survival in ancient times was a daily challenge. In today's world it is still often helpful, if not necessary, for both a woman and a man to protect and raise their children. Modern humans are a testament to the success of the survival strategies their ancestors developed over eons of trial and error.

Both men and women have in their genes the most successful mate selection criteria that worked best for millions of years. One main thing women found to be most helpful was selecting a male with alpha male dominance characteristics. Good health and a strong male body, plus an aggressive attitude, provided good genes and protection for the women and children.

Women still feel a subconscious need for a male mate to impregnate her with strong healthy sperm and genes, and to protect and provide care for her and the offspring. This is the way it worked best for survival of humans for millions of generations. That pattern is still implanted in women's DNA today even though the world has become a very different environment for the past few dozen generations.

Women in the past, and even today, watch men's body language to observe if they have weak or strong dominant alpha male characteristics that imply being a good provider and protector. Women use men's body language as one of the more important, but not the only, selection criteria when choosing a mate.

Men's ancient ancestors were hunters. When the ancient hunter was hunting game he had an image in his brain of how the game looked. Imprinted in the DNA of all men are genes geared to make men visually selective about their prey. Most men have a good picture in their head of what the prey looks like. And it looks like a naked woman!

By about 30,000 years ago, our ancient ancestors had evolved in body and brain very close to the physical likeness we are today. Very few physical changes have occurred in human bodies over the past 30,000 years. That means we are still using a body and brain design that is approximately 30,000 years old!

When a man kisses a woman his limbic system (part of the "old brain") revs up to get ready for what his body was designed to do: make more copies of his DNA (i.e. make babies). His brain and organs blast out neurotransmitters, pheromones, and hormones to get ready to fulfill his biological purpose. He is a hunter at his most basic physical level and he has an intense image in his brain of what he is going after!

Men are very visual because their ancient ancestors were hunters for millions of generations. The men who were most successful in making babies with their DNA did so by being good hunters. The best hunters were very important for the group's survival. The best hunters were greatly valued and had the power to control the group or tribe. Their rewarding position at the top of the group came with some privileges. That usually meant he had first choice in food, comfort, and as much sex as he wanted. (Those were the "good old days!")

The evolutionary advantage was with the men who had frequent sex with many women. The most successful offspring came from young healthy women. The older the woman, the more chance for birth defects. Men who could visually pick the women with signs of youth and health produced the most healthy offspring with their DNA. That DNA is still in men today. Men are more visual than women and at any age have a preference for women with the signs of youth and good health.

Some of the signs of youth and good health are these:

• Small nose and ears plus big eyes, full lips, and high forehead are youthful features.
• Healthy skin, hair, teeth, and eyes. These are appealing because they imply the woman is healthy and can produce healthy children.
• Symmetrical face and body. This is considered "good looking" and indicates good health and low chromosome damage.
• Flashy and classy. A "trophy" woman demonstrates to all the other guys that the man is a "great hunter" -- or so he hopes.

  In the DNA of both men and women is the program for producing the most successful offspring to carry-on their DNA. For men, this means the male ancient DNA carries a drive for frequent sex with as many young healthy women as he can get to cooperate. And this drive does not diminish much throughout life as men age. Only by social pressure is the drive outwardly controlled in the majority of men.

1. To show that they are strong and are an Alpha Male. 2. To scare other males off and minimize competition. 3. To let the women see they are there 'hunting' and are a dominant type male.

Instinctually for survival reasons, females seek a male who is healthy and strong so he can protect her and the offspring. Therefore women seek the "alpha male" type when available. Men know this, at least in their DNA. Therefore the territory display, plus all the alpha male dominance body language they can muster up, is suppose to attract the women. At least that is the old DNA program that worked for millions of generations of men who were hunters of both game and women.

If not interested in being picked-up, women avoid making eye contact with men in public places. If their eyes do meet, the women disconnect by quickly looking off to the RIGHT or LEFT. They may even shift in their chair so their body is facing more away from the guy. That indicates 'no interest' right now.

A lingering look sends a powerful message of more than casual interest. What the guy is looking for is a woman who looks back at him slightly longer than usual, then disconnects by looking DOWN. Looking down is a natural flirting body language sign of submissiveness. In her DNA is a strong unconscious need for a male to help her complete her biological destiny: that is, to pass-on her DNA to offspring. Her looking down is million year old DNA programming asking for his help! However, consciously she may think all she is looking for is a new friend to spend some time.

Women who do not want a man's advances, and do not want him to approach, will quickly disconnect eye contact and look to their LEFT or RIGHT. They will not look down if they want to be left alone. Quickly looking left or right means they are not interested and definitely are not going to be passive if approached.

They often also turn their upper body away. At their deep unconscious level they are hiding their breasts from view and saying, "You can't see that I am a woman. Do not approach me." Any clueless guy approaching a woman sending these negative body language cues is setting himself up for a harsh and painful rejection!

When she wants a new guy to know that she desires him to come physically and emotionally closer to her, she will touch him. It will appear to happen very casually or even accidentally. Her touch will always be on his arm or back, as these are the least sexual places on the body. It will be a pat or soft momentary touch for only a few seconds and then she will pull back and carry on the conversation as if nothing is different. However, something BIG is happening!

She is then waiting for him to touch her back exactly like she touched him. Same pressure. Same length of time. Same casual way. And he should do that return touch in the next minute or two after hers. If he waits too long it says to her that he is not going to accept her invitation to get closer -- or that he is too dense to read her body language cues.

What worked best in millions of men's male ancestors to produce the most healthy offspring was frequent sex with young healthy females. Older females had chromosome damage that frequently produced children with genetic defects. Over millions of generations of trial and error breeding, the statistical odds for most successful offspring were in favor of the young healthy female mothers. The male DNA programming that evolved from that evolutionary experiment is still influencing men today.

A modern man walking the street in expensive clothes may look like the ultimate product of civilization. However, in his DNA is still an ancient animal-like drive to survive and breed to produce more DNA packages (i.e. babies). This drive decreases only slightly as he ages up into his final years. The only thing that keeps the hunter in him from jumping on every young pretty female passing him is his training for living in a civilized culture and fear of prosecution -- or being killed by the female's male mate.

It is interesting, but sad, to observe how some elderly men revert back to their hunter-breeder instinctual animal ways when their new brain frontal lobes have become damaged or destroyed by accident or aging diseases. The still intact deep inner old brain area brings out the ancient sexual drive behaviors that would normally be suppressed. Any female worker in a care unit for the aging will tell you that a frequent ongoing problem with men with dementia is inappropriate sexual advances on all the females. Some elderly men who can not remember their name or where they are, still have an ancient memory that they should be jumping on the bones of all the women possible to make more packages of DNA! Most likely all they can be truly blamed for is attacking with a "dead weapon".

The dark center of the eye, called the pupil, is constantly changing size. Two things affect its size: overall light level and emotions. Since the pupil can not be controlled consciously it is an excellent and reliable broadcaster of emotions.

When the pupil is closed down to a small opening (when not in bright light) it indicates a lack of interest or something distasteful. Dilated (wide open) pupils indicate high interest.

When talking to a woman, a man's high interest is evident by his expanded pupils. HIs "interest" really may be "desire'. When a person looks around, at the mouth and maybe even lower body parts, there is 'lust in those orbs' and the pupils will be wide open!

In most cases the women may only very briefly make eye contact, then disconnect by looking off to the RIGHT or LEFT. They may even shift in their chair so their body is facing more away from you. That indicates 'no interest' right now.

A woman who looks back at you slightly longer than usual, then disconnects by looking DOWN, sends a powerful body language message of more than casual interest. A lingering eye contact then looking down is a natural flirting body language sign of interest and submissiveness. In her DNA is a strong unconscious need for a male to help her complete her biological destiny: that is, to pass-on her DNA to offspring. Her looking down is DNA programming asking for your help! However, consciously she may think all she is looking for is a new friend to spend some time.

A real smile says, "I like you. I am happy to see you." A smile is a very powerful tool for flirting. A woman's smile, with eye contact, is seen by a man as an immediate invitation for much more closeness. That is a signal programmed in to his old brain limbic system and he can't ignore it. Whether he wants to or not, his brain will change his body chemicals to start getting ready for action.

The main point here is that a real smile is a powerful tool for enhancing relationships of all types. It is body language that says, "I like you and I am happy to see you. I won't hurt you." These are words everyone likes to hear. Even if you are not actually speaking those words, your smile will say them for you and that will make the other person especially happy to be with you.

The real smile (with both the mouth and eye areas activated) is a more accurate reflection of mood. In the polite or 'false' smile, the lip corners stretch sideward with little upward curl and there are no visible crow's-feet at the corners of the eyes.

The smile face can be traced back to our ancestors, the primates, who still display a wide variety of facial expressions, including the grimace or fear grin and the submissive grin used to show "I am afraid." These expressions evolved into the human smile that now suggests that "I am harmless, friendly and happy to be with you." The smile is used all over the world to indicate pleasure and happiness. Even people who were born blind and have never seen a smile on others display a smile when they are happy and pleased.

Measuring the hip circumference (at its widest part) and dividing that into the waist circumference (located just above the upper hip bone) produces the Waist-Hip-Ratio (WHR). In multicultural research it was determined that nearly all men preferred a WHR of 0.7 (waist circumference 70% of hips circumference).

This WHR of 0.7 for females has been shown to correlate strongly with general good health and fertility. Women with a WHR near 0.7 have optimal levels of estrogen and experience fewer major diseases such as diabetes, cardiovascular disorders and ovarian cancers.

Research has found that men with WHRs around 0.9 are generally healthy and fertile with less prostate cancer and testicular cancer. WHR is a better predictor of mortality in older people than body mass index (BMI). Women with a low waist-hip ratio have been shown in studies to be smarter and have smarter offspring.

When it comes to either emotional infidelity or sexual infidelity by a female mate, men are most disturbed by sexual infidelity. It is the opposite for women. Women fear emotional infidelity more than sexual infidelity.

When a wife or female mate has had illicit sex, the husband or mate fears he will end up investing his own resources in raising another man's offspring. Women fear emotional infidelity more than sexual infidelity because the men's resources may be lost and shifted to a new mate.

Throughout history the penalty for a woman's sexual infidelity has been treated much more severely than men's wanderings. Recent genetic DNA research has found that more females have strayed and cockolded their mate with another males offspring than was realized. This has been found in not only humans but also in pairing animals such as lions and gorillas. The rate of female transgressions appears much closer to the male's record, which is much more often overlooked and accepted. Because of the more severe penalty on women it appears they have kept their secret well until genetic testing was perfected.

When most normal people (not psychotic) are lying they show signs of stress in their posture, movements and facial expressions. Hand-to-face touching increase, especially nose rubbing and mouth covering. Since tension is high in liars, they need some self-comforting. They stroke their hair and touch their face more frequently and harder than usual. Scratching and rubbing their nose is common in liars but don't accuse all nose-rubbers of being liars!

Men mostly lie to increase their status and ego.
Women mostly lie to make others feel good to insure a safe relationship.

Signs that someone is becoming uncomfortable when lying:

• rocking
• leg swinging
• tapping

• intermittent closing of the eyes
• slight tucking of the chin into the chest
• shoulder hunching

These indicators only give you a 'heads up' that something is not quite right about what the person is saying. Body language and facial expressions are good indicators of when a person is lying but the indicators are not foolproof.

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